L.A. Mayor Eric Garcetti threatened Wednesday to shut off water and power to homes that host parties. Not to be outdone, New York Mayor DeBlasio set up checkpoints to enter Manhattan. You know the world sucks when the best news in the last six months is that at least the explosion wasn’t nuclear.
God Bless America, and how's everybody? The Wall Street Journal reported the Gallup poll which says 84% of Americans blame the media for the nation’s bitter divisions. But every year in August there is a proven and happy way to release all the tension. This is National Clown Week, so arm yourselves and shoot to kill.
President Trump ignited establishment alarm Thursday suggesting that Election Day could be delayed. I think the left must be legally blind. Saturday Night Live wasted five years using Alec Baldwin as its Trump impersonator, when Gary Busey was right in front of their eyes the entire time.
Ellen DeGeneres’s talk show career is in jeopardy as Warner Brothers is investigating charges on social media against her production company. Former employees posted she was abusive to her staff in a toxic work environment. If that’s true, her next logical career move would be Congress.
The Major League Baseball season got underway Thursday when the Washington Nationals hosted the New York Yankees in the season opener in Washington. Millions of television viewers tuned in to enjoy the pre-game ceremony. Dr. Fauci was on hand to throw out the First Amendment.
God Bless America, and how's everybody? The White House press conference Wednesday opened with some welcome and long-hoped-for news from the pharmaceutical industry. We knew it had to happen eventually. Baby Boomers at Pfizer Lab finally invented the vaccine for COVID-19, after giving up trying to figure out how to go on Zoom.
Dr. Fauci lashed back at a White House Task Force member Thursday who’d said Fauci was wrong about everything. New debates rage over school openings and sports resumptions amid shutdowns. I just cleaned my TV screen with anti-virus wipes and lost CNN, MSNBC and Fox News.
WalMart announced a new policy effective nationwide Wednesday requiring every customer entering the store to be wearing a face mask. Reaction was swift. A lot of Americans are quite insulted that WalMart, who doesn’t care if your butt is covered, is telling you that your face has to be.
The U.S. Supreme Court handed down a landmark decision on Thursday ruling that Eastern Oklahoma by signed treaty is still Indian Territory.
John Wayne Airport in Orange County might be re-named due to a remark he made supporting white supremacy in a Playboy interview 50 years ago. It’s been John Wayne Airport for 40 years. ...
Liberty College will celebrate the Fourth of July by posting a detailed explanation and history of the Constitution and the reason behind each Article and each Amendment.
The Dixie Chicks dropped Dixie from their name so as not to offend anyone with the reference to the Confederacy. They’ll just be The Chicks, and only offend feminists. Also, to please the mob, AC/DC will be New Binary, Green Day will be The Green New Deal and The Police will be Defunded.
Warner Brothers in Hollywood announced last week its Looney Tunes Cartoon show on HBO Max will no longer show cartoon characters firing guns. The studio ruled that all guns are out. ...
The Hollywood Reporter warns that cable news hysteria could lead to viewer fatigue and lower ratings. All year long, the news has been nothing but Covid-19, shutdown, police brutality, rioting, and Black Lives Matter. Am I the only one who’s still fighting the scourge of plastic drinking straws?
President Trump holds a rally in Tulsa Saturday where a million people applied to attend but only 20,000 can get in. Expect a volcanic reaction against COVID shutdowns, riots, looting and monument desecration. America hasn’t lost all its marbles, but there’s definitely a hole in the bag.
President Trump took criticism from the media and Democrats Monday for scheduling a huge rally Saturday. The CDC concurred, saying the 20,000 attendees at the Trump rally in Tulsa are in danger from the spread of COVID-19. However, they said the 40,000 protesters will be completely safe.
The American Medical Journal says plastic surgeons are doing big business since re-opening due to pent-up demand.
The Comedy Store on the Sunset Strip in West Hollywood is planning to re-open next weekend and resume our stand-up comedy shows. I’ve tried to stay cheerful during the shutdown. ...
The Weather Channel reported Santa Ana breezes blew off the Imperial Desert into Southern California, heralding a new normal in our local weather. I’m so lulled by home confinement it took me by surprise. I can’t believe it’s riot season already and I still have my Covid season decorations up.
Ring magazine reports that Mike Tyson is looking to make a comeback at age fifty and wants a rematch with old foe Evander Holyfield.
Los Angeles police began citing joggers and walkers who refused to wear facial covering while jogging or walking in public.
USA Today reports parents are worried about a possible lack of summer activities deemed safe enough for children and teenagers to enjoy. The outbreak has canceled church youth camps back in my home state of Oklahoma.
Los Angeles voters stunned pundits in the special election Tuesday when GOP candidate Mike Garcia upset a Democrat in a U.S. House race. It says a lot. Who knew that all you had to do was close down the beaches for a couple of months and L.A. would start electing Republicans to Congress.
Dr. Fauci went into self-quarantine last week, however he went on Skype from home to threaten to recommend closing down the 2020 sports seasons. He’s now threatening the sacred religion of college football. I say we open the country now before Oklahoma has to play Texas this fall on Zoom.
President Trump will be targeted by a new House committee claiming he betrayed America by late actions on Covid-19. No one feels more betrayed lately than Generation X...
President Trump was optimistic Thursday, reporting progress in the war on COVID-19. We’re attacking the virus from three angles. Pfizer is working on a treatment, Oxford is working on a vaccine, and Trump just called Hillary to tell her he’s heard the virus is going to testify against her.
Willie Nelson went on social media last week to thank all his fans for their best wishes when he celebrated his 87th birthday.
NBC News reported the mayor of Las Vegas is getting backing from the Wynn Hotel after she revealed plans to re-open the city in mid- May. The city is confident it can handle any threat from the virus. The difference between Wuhan and Las Vegas is, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.
President Trump’s convicted former lawyer Michael Cohen was one of thousands of prisoners freed due to the COVID-19 scare. The virus resulted in a feeling of forgiveness across the land. Any day, I expect to see a public health commercial in which O.J. Simpson assures us that gloves work.
The White House reported mobile testing is available to determine immunity from the coronavirus with testing facilities now set up in all 50 states. Baby Boomers flocked to the test ...
A Chicago federal judge denied R. Kelly’s request for release from jail over his fear of COVID-19 Tuesday. It’s to protect all the witnesses to his behavior.
The New York Post says a Bengal Tiger in the Bronx Zoo in New York developed a dry cough over the weekend which prompted zoo veterinarians and epidemiologists to give the tiger a medical exam. The big cat tested positive for corona virus. Great, now I have to keep six feet away from tigers.
President Trump spoke solemnly to the American people at a press conference Tuesday and he laid out the sacrifices it will take to defeat the virus
Major League Baseball postponed the season scheduled to start this week due to Corona Virus that crossed the ocean to the U.S. from China this year.
President Trump continued calling the pandemic the virus rather than the Chinese virus this week. Trump said even though it started in Wuhan, he doesn’t want Chinese-Americans to feel stigmatized. Every country in the world has the Corona Virus now, but China got it right off the bat.
Treasury Secretary Steve Mnuchin expressed confidence a relief bill for business and workers is doable Tuesday.
New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft told reporters he wishes departing quarterback Tom Brady the best.
Ralph’s supermarket in Santa Monica reportedly made a $1 million in one day Thursday when customers panicked over the COVID-19 scare.
God Bless America, and how’s everybody? The National Institute of Health Director Dr. Anthony Fauci addressed Congress Thursday and warned that Corona Virus will spread before it begins to wane.
The Comedy Store tonight will mark my forty-fourth year of performing at the world capital of comedy.
The Rolling Stones website announced that the group’s 2020 North American tour will begin in San Diego’s baseball stadium in May. They should be guarded by the CDC. If the Corona Virus gets into the dressing room and infects Keith Richards, the virus could mutate and live forever.
Harvey Weinstein was convicted on one rape charge in New York Monday and taken off to jail to await sentencing.