Trusted local news leader for Prescott area communities since 1882
Mon, July 22

Hamilton: Hollywood really feeling the heat

HOLLYWOOD — God bless America, and how’s everybody?

The Weather Channel reported the Santa Ana winds arrived in Southern California on Monday, baking Los Angeles in 100-degree heat. It required desperate measures to stay cool. It’s so hot in Hollywood that people are saying nice things about President Trump just for the cold stares.

The Hollywood Reporter noted that Sunday night’s Tony Awards on CBS set a record for the lowest TV viewer ratings in history. Nevertheless, scheduling the Tony Awards on the final Sunday of Gay Pride Week was the perfect combination. It’s like when Cinco de Mayo falls on Taco Tuesday.

Travel Magazine published a survey revealing that a record number of American tourists are planning to vacation abroad this summer, despite State Department warnings. I’ve just finished booking my own vacation to the Dominican Republic. I fly down there first class and I fly back cargo.

Boston Red Sox legend David Ortiz was released from the hospital in Santo Domingo on Monday after he was shot Friday in the Dominican Republic. He’s fine but he’ll never regain use of his Dominican Republic citizenship. Ortiz is back in the U.S. where he will be made an honorary Citizen of Chicago.

Joe Biden was shown in a nationwide poll defeating Donald Trump by 53 to 41 percent on Friday. I think it’s a sucker poll. If the Democrats nominate Biden, I believe it again will give Trump the chance to prove that Americans will take crazy over stupid every time.

House Oversight Committee Chairman Gerald Nadler vowed to soldier on in his impeachment probe of Trump. Nadler on Monday trotted out Watergate ghost John Dean to testify against the president. I can’t wait to hear what Johnny Carson says about it tonight in the monologue.

New York shut down Monday after a small helicopter crashed into the top of a 75-story building. It surprised me that a helicopter hitting a skyscraper caused such panic. My first reaction to the news was, somebody needs to tell Al-Qaeda that the recession is over.

Iowa held its Democratic Party Dinner and Dance on Saturday where by tradition, the Democratic candidates give speeches. Iowans love these feasts. The attendees devoured a thousand steaks, 1,500 sweet potatoes and 1,600 ears of corn, and the band’s drummer is missing.

Biden was a no-show at the dinner on Saturday as his poll numbers began to drop. He needs to buck up. Last week, he switched his lifetime position on abortion after he was confronted about it by Hollywood actress Alyssa Milano, but the smell of her hair was worth it.

The All England Club is preparing to host the Wimbledon Tennis Championships in London this month, televised on ESPN. The women’s tennis matches are always riveting, if sometimes a little embarrassing. Wimbledon is that time of year when blind viewers think that ESPN is airing porn.

NASA will sell seats aboard the Space Station to tourists willing to pay for the ticket. For $60 million you watch 17 sunrises while orbiting the earth at 17,000 miles an hour. Or for $20 you can see the same thing at the same speed by dropping a tab of LSD.

The Tampa Bay Tribune reported that a young Florida man was pulled over by Tampa police on Friday night, and he denied that the cocaine all over his nose was his. After cops searched him he denied that the packet of cocaine found on him was his. He now faces 10 to 20 years in Congress.

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