Originally Published: July 4, 2018 5:59 a.m.
HOLLYWOOD — The National Retail Federation reports Americans will spend $7 billion dollars on cookouts and other celebrations of the signing of the Declaration of Independence today. We all celebrate different things. I’d like to salute the real heroes of this country, the ones who still drive without GPS.
President Trump began the process of subtraction on Monday by interviewing four of his eight candidates for the Supreme Court in the Oval Office. The winner could decide the direction of this country for decades to come. Everyone agrees this is the most exciting season of The Apprentice ever.
Sen. Chuck Schumer asked Democrats to dial down the hysterical rants against President Trump in policy speeches. The party’s left wing spoke at the ballot box Tuesday, June 26. In an attempt to make any news about President Trump tolerable, Sunday liquor sales are now legal in Minnesota.
The Boston Pops Orchestra will perform a concert climaxing in the Stars and Stripes Forever. What a tradition. America is the beautiful story of how British-Americans conquered a continent, and then invited the entire world to come over and breathe its air, enjoy its liberties and work it for us.
President Trump’s former lawyer Michael Cohen told ABC’s George Stephanopoulos in an off-camera interview Sunday his wife and kids and country come first to him. He’s renouncing his prior allegiances. You don’t say this without eight million New Yorkers immediately nicknaming you Fredo.
President Trump met possible Supreme Court nominees after Justice Kennedy announced his retirement Wednesday, June 27, at the White House. Kennedy looked weird in a business suit. I guess it is always a little strange to retire from a job that requires you to show up for work every day in a robe.
Miss Hooters Laiken Baumgartner announced on her crowning Saturday she intends to help Hooters compete for Millennial diners. She sees herself as a company salesperson, not a model. Hooters just created a car ride transportation service to sports events for customers, it’s called Boober.
Jerry Richardson had to sell the Carolina Panthers for $2 billion over his sexual harassment at work. Don Sterling sold the Clippers for $2 billion after racist remarks. Women and blacks can’t believe that the penalty for sexual harassment and racism is a cashier’s check for $2 billion dollars.
The Weather Channel reported a huge high-pressure system over the Eastern Seaboard, which caused record high temperatures. It was over 100 degrees during the border protests Monday in Washington, prompting the Episcopal Bishop to warn President Trump he just thinks this is hot.
Episcopal priests protested in Washington and some claimed Trump followers aren’t Christian due to his tough border policy. Reaction was swift. The Methodists are now taking in so many refugees from the Episcopal Church they must put the parents in the sanctuary and the kids in MYF.
The New York Post praised Eric Trump for heroic action when he spotted a woman fainting at a New York train station Friday. He ran into rush-hour traffic, chased down an ambulance, and sent it back to her. Eric not only saved her life, he’s also been hired by several law firms as a personal trainer.
Toys R Us ended its close-out sales in 800 stores Sunday and closed its doors after being in the toy business 70 years nationwide. They simply couldn’t stand the competition. Toys R Us couldn’t supply the country with items for the immature as fast as the Democratic Party.