Around the Bluhmin' Town: Deliver inside my house, and do the dishes too

Amazon wants to visit you. OK, not exactly. But they would like electronic access to your front door so when you order a package, the driver or any carrier can deliver your box inside your house. I say brilliant!

It is called the Amazon Key. And because we know how Amazon is taking over the world, the next step will be the driver can walk the dog, sweep the floor and load up the dishwasher! There will be no end in sight to what can be done in the name of service! (Or intrusion).

Well, Americans (some) have sticky fingers. In other words, thieves seem to steal 11 million packages left on doorsteps and porches every year in this fine country! So possibly, some thieves might be the actual purchaser claiming to have never received the package (while they are watching the new television), but most “disappearing” boxes are true stranger thefts.

Yep, there are mean people driving around neighborhoods and running up to strangers’ doors and grabbing boxes. What the heck is happening here? In our little, safe, lovely towns we are being robbed!

I did mention a few years ago how every single apple was picked off my front yard tree, which would have required a ladder and a whole lot of nerve! I recall running into the house screaming to my husband, “We’ve been robbed!” When I showed him the damage, a tree that had been loaded with hundreds of apples picked clean, and not even one on the ground, he could only wonder what monster was out on the loose. The crime was never solved.

Oh, getting back to “The Key.” Christmas is coming and I want to order gifts and have them safely delivered inside the house. My husband says the technology to remotely open doors will soon be hacked and criminals will have easy access to millions of homes. My friend, the attorney, says that allowing strangers to enter your house is as dangerous as letting expensive items sit idle on your doorstep. A police officer was quoted as saying, “this is the stupidest idea yet, and therefore plenty of people will love it.” Very funny!

Well, all the naysayers go at it. Wait and see. Soon our drivers will deliver the goods, clean the house, cook our meal and pour the wine. We are getting close to that!

A friend is writing a book (fiction) about a company that overtakes the world. Every item, from food to tools, comes from one source. And eventually, people the world over gradually believe that doing anything, like cooking, cleaning, going to stores to shop, will be completely passé. Hairdressers and nail-techs will come to us!

We will be the human race that stopped the “race” and began to settle (decline) into the mode of “gatherers.” The “hunter” part of the equation is gone. We get our devices, look, and click away. A modern (hellish) world is evolving.

OK, so deliver my packages right inside my house, oh, and I might have a horse or two to feed. Check the barn. Let’s embrace the future and see how convenient (lazy) our life can become. But wait, perhaps the only “key” we need is to our cars, so we can go out and shop local! Do it! Live local. Lock your doors.

Judy Bluhm is a writer and a local Realtor. Have a comment or a story? Email Judy at judy@judybluhm.com.